How I Beat Depression

Paying attention to our own language and how we speak is vital for the recovery of depression.

What we say to others matters to them and ourselves. The experience of depression can skew and obliterates our sense of meaning meaning and therefore it tries to trap the sufferer into not critically reflecting on the language that come out of their mouth. Negative thinking and language which includes general and self talk is often quite apparent with people experiencing depression. The negativity can also be couched in cycnism and sarcasm.

In my own recovery I noticed that I  didn’t critically reflect on my language because language itself fell into the meaningless void when I was depressed. Being stuck in a deep state of apathy I thought eveything including all words, was ultimately meaninglessness.  

When I started to believe in myself by other people believing in me I had faith to acknoledge how negative and damning my language was and that if I changed my negative, damning, cynical language into positive, healthy tender language – that supports and builds up myself and others – my emotions would turn from the better and I would feel genuinely better about myself.

This turned out to be totally true. And it really began to realise that we are what we say, not what we eat.

So pay attention to your language and the language that comes out of other people’s mouth. If often reflects their inner state.

Over emotionalism and over intellectualism

The tension we hold in our bodies can so often be heard in our voices. When I took a long harder sober look at my language I realised that I was forever oscillating between over-intellectualism and over emotionalism. Over intellectual in the sense that I frequently spouted complex and esoteric words, often not considering their proper meaning; this helped build a false ivory tower which I could feel safe in, comfortably at a healthy distance from people.

Over intellectualism functions to cloister people into elevated and closed off positions – it always springs from bruised and damaged egos. It never is really concerned with building up others; rather, reinforcing smug superiority is the aim of the game with this inveterate habit.

Over emotionalism comes not so much from a bruised or damaged ego needed to assert itself with superiority, but rather the nagging, churlish child needing to ensure all the world knows about all its little aches and pains.  Who’s going to feed me now? I’m tired? Who’s going to push my wheelchair when I’m old? My head hurts? I want this. I need that. Short staccato gunfire demanding not so much a response but an available ear to hear their whinge-a-thon. These two voices, one stuck in the head, one stuck in the emotions, seized me strongly during depression. I didn’t whinge so much because my problem more lay in the fact I didn’t communicate my proper concerns, however the previous comment about always going on about being tired is a good example of this voice. Many people frequently alternate between these two voices, one normally takes precedence based personality of the depressed person.

The solution to negativity is making a concerted effort to change one’s language. It some cases it will be almost like learning and adopting a new lanaguage. And that’s right it’s a concerted effort. Recovery from depression takes effort. So many people want the magic bullet, the instantaneous short-cut, the quick relief option. And it’s not hard to understand why, so many things in societ yare marketed in this way, we just get accustomed that the sucessful treatment and management of depression can be like taking a panadol for a headache.

The How I Beat suite of website firmly believes that ‘beating’ requires sustained daily action and activity. And that not just for the mental health sufferer, the same goes for anyone who wants to ward of feelings of depression, intertia and anxiety.  

Stop swearing.

That’s right clean you mouth with some soap (ha, how much of a parent does that sound). Try and elimiante harshness and condeming language. One characterisitc

Affirm others

Affirmation is so important. Learn to take time to point out the good qualities in other people. Affirmation is critial in slowly shifting one’s language and belief from negatviity into positivity. The feelings generally come around later, action is required first.